Umm..., I'm going to answer the questions, and maybe the answers can a part of my outline or my presentation.
Just like my daily speech said, this is the experience that changed my life. Before this, I was kind of more optimistic. I mean I wouldn't pretend I'm happy when I'm not, I wouldn't wear a mask on my face. After it happened, I always tried to hide myself away from others. I can't really remember how I feel, I just knew that the girl lying on the bed passed away and she is my best friend and she means a lot to me. It was too fast, it just happened rapidly, I wasn't ready for that, I never was prepared for her death. Everday seemed meanningless at first, and I was just idling away my time instead of keep going on. I have to admit I had thought of dying or something, but that's too selfish, and irresposible. I decided to live, my life and her life. I don't know if this means that I have walked through the pain or not, but what I am sure about is that I am now trying not to linger in the past. Sometime I will still think of her and I will feel sad. Not everytime when I think of her I cry, so once I cry, I must felt really sorrowful, and until there's no more tears, until my eyes are totally dry out, I no longer feel the pain. Then I'll have a nice sleep which is deep and long. I found that it is easier to think of her when I'm tired than when I'm energetic. It's kind of a circulation, I get tired, more and more tired, then I have enough rest, and day after day, I become tired again. That'so far I got to.
It took me sometime to organize these stuff in my brain, I guess they're still a mess, I always don't know how to express these things, so...that's all.